Gottman-Informed Techniques Used in Couples Counselling

In my work with couples, I regularly draw on research-based Gottman methods and techniques, adapted to the specific needs of each relationship. These may include:

• Identifying and understanding recurring conflict patterns and triggers
• Learning soft start-ups to reduce defensiveness and escalation
• Recognizing and responding to repair attempts during conflict
• Improving emotional attunement and everyday communication
• Strengthening friendship, respect, and positive connection
• Managing perpetual problems more constructively
• Building skills for emotional regulation and de-escalation
• Increasing clarity around needs, boundaries, and expectations

The focus is on practical, usable skills that support healthier interaction, not on assigning blame or forcing agreement.

What to Expect in Couples Counselling

Couples counselling sessions are typically 1.5 hours, which allows enough time for both partners to be heard and for the work to move at a thoughtful, manageable pace. Early sessions focus on understanding your relationship history, current concerns, and the patterns that tend to lead to conflict or disconnection.

Sessions are structured and balanced. I work to maintain fairness, clarity, and emotional safety for both partners while slowing conversations down when needed. At times, sessions may include guided discussion, skill-building, or reflective exercises designed to help couples communicate more effectively and respond differently to familiar challenges.

Progress in couples counselling is gradual and practical. The goal is not perfection, but increased understanding, improved communication, and greater capacity to navigate disagreements and stress together. Over time, couples often report feeling more grounded, less reactive, and more connected in their relationship.